Our Home Ed Journey So Far

It all started when I organised to pick a buggy up from a local lady on behalf of a friend of mine. We met up at the local toddler group, she had her 2 children with her, they were of school age, I asked if it was a teacher training day to which I was told 'no, we home educate'. ' What's that all about? how does it work?' etc I reeled off all the questions that home edders are asked everyday. Nicky explained the basics of it and that it was a legal option. I went away thinking how wonderful it sounded and perfect for us, as my eldest, Einstein, was having an awful time in school, again! this was the second school we had tried and things were getting worse. He was being called a trouble causer, he was bored and he didn't like going. School had no intention of giving him any extra consideration for his behaviour because he didn't have a diagnosis yet! I knew his behaviours in school were made worse by the lack of understanding from staff, a lack of thought as well. You have a child that chews things and fiddles, you don't leave him with a pencil and no paper! He will draw on the table or chair! StuntMan was in reception year and never spoke at school, they were considering speech therapy, but I knew there was nothing wrong with him at home.

I thought about the idea for a few days, spoke to my mum, she completely supported the idea, so decision was made, deregistration letter sent in and the kids never went back. I had no idea what I was doing, or how we were going to do it. I had a 1 year old at home and now my 2 older boys too. I thought I had to follow the curriculum and do structured lessons, but very quickly I learned that wasn't the case and that it wasn't working for us. Einstein needed some structure in the sense that he needed to know roughly how our days were going to go, but didn't need the school type timetable. So we took some time off to deschool and get used to being with each other again all day. We went to museums and parks, read books and played games, played on the computer and watched tv. There were no local groups, the only ones were more than half an hour away and at the time there was little chance of him coping in a new place with lots of new people.

For a while we felt quite isolated, the boys had a few local friends that they saw regularly, so having friends didn't worry me, but I had little to no support or anyone to discuss the day to day decisions with, or brainstorm ideas with. Then I found some people on facebook, fellow home edders, some in a similar position, others that had been around a long time and then there were people very knew to it all and in a similar position as I had been a few months previous. I learnt about autonomous, child led learning, and this is the path we followed, I backed off (well I tried to) from telling the kids to sit and work, we picked topics between us, chose places to visit, and holidays to have. I've tried to get rid of the school mentality, but it's been forced on me all my life as being the only choice, that school was the best place for children to be. But it was soon apparent how wrong school is for many kids, how much the schools strive to create sheeple, how children are made to ask to go to the toilet, or have a drink, basic needs that as an adult we would be fuming if we were made to ask. Home Ed is giving my children chance to self regulate, to think about their decisions etc, they were independent kids and are now very independent and confident. I quickly built up a lot if home ed friends, most of whom are still there 4 years later :) some are long gone, due to differences of opinion on parenting style and personality clashes. I've met up with quite a few too and made some really good friends. People I can ring if I need them, or arrange to meet up. I've noticed that as my knowledge of home ed and the law have increased, people come to me for advice, which I'm happy to do. I am glad that the stuff I now know can help someone who finds themselves starting off on the home ed journey with little knowledge like I did. I'm now part of a lovely local group, we have fortnightly meet ups and the group is steadily growing.

Over the last 3 years we've reassessed our approach and introduced a bit more structure when it seemed needed and backed off when needed. I think we have found a balance, Einstein is 11 and loves reading and computers, so his learning is based around that, he does workbooks to cover the stuff he hasn't covered by reading, he refused to write when he was little, but now is a lot more confident and quite happily writes lists of rules for his friends' secret groups, he is currently writing plans for a computer game. He thinks he will be ready to do his maths and science GCSE in the next year or so.

StuntMan loves his bike and scooter, he's often found out on the street practising stunts, he loves drawing too. He does some workbook type work, but gets very upset and frustrated if he comes across something he doesn't understand. But he is soon reminded that he is only 8 and is already working on 9-10 year old work books and that he can slow down and not worry about it.

Princess is nearly 5 and loves writing, reading, drawing and maths, she's working on approximately 6-7 year old stuff, shes a clever little mite and understands multiplication and times tables, she can have extremely intelligent conversations too, way beyond her years.

I seem to have 3 very bright children, which is amazing as I'm not very academic, they are inquisitive and interested in stuff many kids scoff at, they are interested in history and love random days out to amazing castles or stately homes, they love nature, visiting woodland and lakes, they love the beach, they also love their friends, we always have lot of other kids at the house playing. I love how excited they all get at simple things like amazing scenery, or a new book. We have so many books my dining room looks like a library! They all like reading and as their confidence grows, their interests widen.

My parenting has changed over the years too, instead of 'go to sleep' 'wake up' 'hurry up' I can now be found suggesting that its maybe time to be sleeping, and saying ok, one more book, or one more film, they are all really good at knowing when they are tired and sleep when they are. We wake up when we are ready and the house is lot calmer, don't get me wrong, there are still days where I shout and wonder what on earth we are doing. The kids have their moments, Einstein is very good at needing the loo when its time to do something, or StuntMan will turn on the water works, or Princess will throw a strop. They are normal kids, and just cos I home ed doesn't mean they are perfect. If we are in Tesco and they are moaning about being bored, or are fighting with each other, you can see the staff staring at you, wondering why they aren't in school, of course the check out person only ever asks why they aren't in school on the days they are being little sods, I tend to reply with that I home educate them and that they are normal kids, so just like at a weekend when the shop is over run with mardy kids, I bring mine in the week instead. Mostly I get positive responses and people out and about think it's brilliant, I hear 'Ooh i couldn't do that, I need the time away from them' 'wow is that legal?' 'wow good on ya, wish I'd know about it when my kids were little' etc, I do try to make sure people know as much as I can share in such a short conversation, so far a guy at Tesco has pulled his kids out of school, thanks to me telling him I home ed. Because I damaged my hip when I was pregnant with Princess (due to fainting and falling) my boys have been helping around the house for years, she is starting to now help too, they are responsible for keeping their rooms tidy and putting their clothes away, they sort and do the clothes washing, emptying and filling the dishwasher, sweeping, cleaning and feeding the animals, they make their own breakfasts and tidy up their toys at the end of the day. I think it's important they are involved in the running of the house so that once the housework and any sit down learning is done, we are free to do what we please, whether that's playing together or independently, it also gives me some adult time to sort out finances or my blog, or helping another home ed family out.


Many kids are kicked out of the house to play out all day, whereas I get involved and help with games and ideas and am always around to settle disagreements, many parents don't seem to care that their kids are out all day at 5 year old, I like to know my children are safe, whilst also letting them have their freedom. Einstein has started going to the youth club and now talks to girls ! He and Ben go to archery together with my ex and StuntMan goes to cubs, recently spending the weekend at camp, without me! Princess is starting rainbows and gymnastics in September. 4 years ago my boys would not have played out, they wouldn't have asked staff where something was in a shop or how much, they would barely talk to the neighbours let alone strangers. Now adays they are chatty and confident and always surprising me. I received a lovely message a few days ago from a lady (jeez she's a lady now not a kid, I feel old now lol) that used to babysit for the boys 8 years ago. She works in a local shop, and said how she dreads kids coming in, but was pleasantly surprised it was my boys and their friend, she said how polite and chatty they were and a pleasure to deal with. I was so proud !

So this is our home ed journey up until today, tomorrow everything could change, but that's cool and why we love home ed, it opens up so many more opportunities, gives the kids the freedom to be who they are.

I'd love to hear your comments, so please feel free to leave a comment :)